Lucky lucky you.
|Not that kind of V8... But Jackie would have been helpful.|
Side note: is there any better scent than fresh hay?
|How do I not know anyone who drives a truck? Or a tractor?|
Well, how does one unload 1600 pounds of hay?
Easy, toss it, stack it, rinse and repeat.
Ok, smarty, how does one unload two 800 pound round bales?
That's like trying to roll a flat tractor tire. Try again.
Back up really fast and slam on the breaks?
Tried it. All I accomplished as to scare my poodles. Tempi got mad and told me to stop driving like a dipshit.
Enter Farm McGyver.
I pretty much ruled out using a paperclip. After all, if I can bend and break a paper clip, how's it going to help me move a round bale? Useless....
Then a plan was hatched. I have a rope, a tree and a truck. Genius!
Step 1: Tie a rope to a tree. Be careful that you tie it in such a way that when pulling on it with a truck the knot will not tighten into an untangleable mess. You have to be able to get BOTH hay bales off...
|Rope. Tree. Check.|
|Rope around bale. Check. Secure to hitch... Check.|
Step 3: Slowly pull forward, listening for the sound of snapping rope, breaking wood or any other sound that your plan has failed. Do a happy dance when the bale thuds off of the bed of the truck onto mostly flat ground.
|One bale down. One to go.|
|Uh London, wardrobe malfunction!|
Step 6: Repeat steps 1 through 5 on the second bale, congratulating yourself the whole time for being so clever. You deserve it.
Step 7: Get those hay bales out of the elements. It's supposed to rain tomorrow! You know that you cant just push them. Even the She-Hulk is bested by round bales. I need something with a little more power.